After 25 You Might As Well Put On Your Parachute Pants

When I was 25 and in seminary I had a very wise friend named Neil tell me to enjoy being 25 because "that is the coolest I will ever be in my life".  I laughed at him, but got a little nervous at the same time.  I wondered what that meant, do I have to leave student ministry, was I going to lose my relevance, was I going to get replaced by a younger cooler model?  These are the questions I wrestled with.  
   After a week of thinking about it, worrying about it, I decided to bring the Yoda in my life into the discussion....my wife.  I asked her "babe, do you think I'm cool".  Se said "no, you are a dork".  Not exactly what I wanted to hear.  We laughed and I went on to tell her what Neil said, and ask her what that meant to her.  She said "I don't know you tell me".  You can see where this conversation was going, not very helpful.  She could see I was uneasy and reminded me of the great adult leaders, and how students loved them, how I thought like a student still, and said she was sure we'd be fine.  I felt frustrated that i didn't get the "you are and always will be the coolest man next to Jonny Depp" and agreed with her but didn't know why I was so uneasy.
   When I went back to Neil I shared what I was going through with his silly comment (the funny thing is he was 10 years older than me and still a great youth pastor).  Through our conversation he asked a valuable question.  One that I will never forget and I keep asking everyday.  He said "what is your ministry built on"?  He went on to describe how many student ministries are built on the personality and coolness of the youth pastor.  He talked about how many youth pastors ride the coolness factor and through the coolness of who they are the ministry grows, students bring friends, and what seems like ministry success happens.  
    Then he dropped the bomb, "most of those people I know like that didn't make it to 30 in ministry".  He illustrated that life after cool is different and a ministry built on the cool leader shrinks when the leader stops being cool, and decreasing coolness is as sure a thing as Apple releasing a new iPod every year.  
   "But I don't want to be an adult pastor, with all the collared shirts, no flip flops, will have to grow a mustache/goatee combo, throw out my video games" I said half meaning all of it, and he laughed.  I realized that day I can only go so far on personality and talent alone.  If I don't have substance, if I am not growing, if I am not deeper than just personality then I'm doomed.  Neil looked me in the eyes, I think he could sense my worry and discouragement thinking this was my last good year of youth ministry, and said "Mike, that is why you went to seminary.  To get substance to bring to your students.  As long as you love students and continue to grow you will be fine".  
   I really believe that day saved my ministry.  That is a day that saved me from flaming out, from doubting my calling when I was no longer the cool pastor (and I definitely am not the cool pastor now and it's debatable if there was ever a moment I was the cool pastor). That was the day I realized I could be 50 and great at student ministry because I had depth.  So I will ask you the same question, "what is your ministry built on"?  Is it personality, or have you committed yourself to loving God, Students, and bringing depth to your ministry?  I want us to make it past the cool.

Finding New Wine Skins in the Old

It's amazing to me that I can hear the same thing over and over again and yet still find new truths. I know the Bible is like that, but I have in the past been very reluctant with messages. I will hear a message preached on a verse or topic and usually I tune it out. This week at Radicalis I heard a man preach on "living like you're dying" which I usually think of the country song (and I absolutely hate country music) so I was tempted to tune out, but a question was asked. "How different would you live if you knew you were going to die in a week?" Not a new question right? I've heard it asked by many pastors, and have even used it messages myself. My mind wondered.

I started thinking though about horror movies, of all things. If you know me you know I have a deep love of B horror movies such as Sharktopus, or Orca, or Mega Shark vs. Giant Squid. Yeah that kind of B movie. E made for SyFy kind of B movie. I think the main reason I love these and hate real horror movies is that I hate being scared, and I can laugh at these. During every one of these movies, my favorite thing to do is to talk to the characters before they die. Tell them "I wouldn't sleep with that person" or "I wouldn't cuss like that" because I know they are going to die and have to explain that to Christ (well at least they would if it was real).

I have never really considered the real fact that they probably wouldn't do that either if they new they were going to meet Christ. Maybe not, but if they REALLY believed they were going to meet Christ, like I believe, when they die they wouldn't. Which got me wondering what I am doing that I would do different if I REALLY believed I could meet Christ at any second.

1. I would serve my wife better- I work hard as I am sure you do too. I serve people all day, and don't gripe, in fact I love it. I live for it. Yet, when I get home I want to unwind. I want to be served, I want to relax, I want to not think and who gets the neglect? My wife. She watches me serve others all day long yet a simple task becomes a chore when I get home and want to unwind. How sad is that? The human I love most (other than Jesus Himself) is her and yet I am least likely to serve her with a smile, go the extra mile, encourage. If it was my last week on earth I would serve with a smile EVERYTIME. I would go the extra mile without being asked. I would deeply desire for her to remember me, not for how great I served others, but how great I served God and HER.

2. I would deal with my sin NOW- The speaker talked about his struggle with porn and said "I wonder if I would struggle with porn this week if I knew it was my last week on earth." My obvious answer is "NO." I have watched the horror movies and in my conversations with the characters learned I don't want to explain that to Christ. Sad that I would think that as long as I fix it a week before I die it's ok. If I wouldn't do that the last week why am I ok with it now. Why am I ok with my anger, my impatience, all my junk and believe it will just get fixed when the reality is I don't know if this is my last week or not. You want to deal with your sin don't just think "this might be my last week" convince yourself it is. Die to yourself, offer yourself as a living sacrifice.

3. I wouldn't wait for perfect conditions to have the conversations I need to have- I am a procrastinator, and I hate failure. I know no one loves it, but I don't get over failure easy at all. I relive it over and over in my mind (I know, I should see number 2 on this list and i promise you God will help me change this in my life). So what do I do, I wait for conditions to be absolutely perfect so that there is no possibility of failure. This is the human side of me that actually ends up stifling God's Spirit from moving in the moment, and it needs to stop.

So what!?! So what do I do now? It's easy and difficult at the same time. Now my job is to believe I am dying not just because I want to be a better Christian, a better husband, a better pastor, but because it is the truth. The truth is my end will come like a thief in the night. Whether it is my death or Christ's return it will come and I might not have the luxury of knowing when my last week is. So I beg you, please join me in living with the joy and peace of knowing we may leave this earth in a week and we need to make it count.

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What I Learned From Karla

I was twenty four, pumped, and ready for anything, as I embarked on my first year in ministry as the high school Pastor at my church. In my mind I had it all together, I knew it all, had seen it all, and was ready to show students, parents, and the other pastors how high school ministry was done.  

My, “I know everything” attitude came to a screeching halt within the first few months, as I experienced my first tragedy. One of my core students was diagnosed with inoperable brain cancer. This information left me speechless. The following year bulged with questions from students, questions I had for God, tears, and ultimately, the most beautiful funeral I have ever had the privilege to be a part of.  The lessons I learned from watching a 15 year old girl named Karla, live a faith better than most 50 year veteran Christians, will never be forgotten:

Students can make a HUGE impact- I always believed this statement, but this experience provided for me a living example. I understood more clearly that a life that is lived for God can change the world.  A life of surrender demonstrates hope. Our students need to show the world they are not the hope of the future but the hope of now.  Karla brought hundreds of people to Christ through a life which showed that death isn’t the worst that can happen to a person and having 2,500 people attend her funeral affirmed that.  I need to consistently remind my students they are the hope for NOW, today.

Lead with your hands tied behind your back- My leadership style tends to be “let me show you how to do it.  I know better, and you should do it the way that I tell you to.”   Students need a leader who is willing let them fail.  If I expect the students in my group to do great things, than I need to show them that I believe in them, and their way of doing things even if that means an occasional crash. Honestly, even though this idea makes me nervous at times I know that great things will happen when I am not there to be the fix-it-man. If I would have tried to help Karla, I would’ve just gotten in the way of God using her grand ways.

Joy is contagious- Karla was one of the most joyful people I have ever met. I couldn’t help smiling when I saw her. If anyone embodied the joy of Christ, this 15 year old girl did, and everyone loved her for it. Sometimes the best witness to our students is showing the joy we have in God. When we look past the stress of the job, the frustration of pay, the ridiculous amount of hours we work, or people that don’t understand us, we should still be joyful for the mere fact that we get to serve a God who died for us, and our students, and loves us unconditionally.  Do my students see and sense my joy for God? They should.

Unfortunately, it took something as shaking as a student’s death, in order for me to believe, with all I have in me, that my students can make a difference in the world. I had a lot to learn from Karla, she was a great teacher.